If Chins Could Kill

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If Chins Could Kill by Bruce Campbell Summary

If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor Here we are together in the digital universe. Somehow, you've clicked yourself to this page. If you came here of your own free will and desire, you and I are going to get along just fine. Life is full of choices. Right now, yours is whether or not to download the autobiography of a mid-grade, kind of hammy actor. Am I supposed to know this guy? you think to yourself. No-and that's exactly the point. You can download a terabyte of books about famous actors and their high-falootin' shenanigans. I don't want to be a spoilsport, but we've all been down that road before. Scroll down to that Judy Garland biography. You know plenty about her already-great voice, troubled life. Scroll down a little further to the Charlton Heston book. Same deal. You know his story too-great voice, troubled toupee. The truth is that though you might not have a clue who I am-unless you watch cable very late at night-there are countless working stiffs like me out there, grinding away every day at the wheel of fortune. If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor documents my time in blue-collar Hollywood, where movies are cheap, the hours are long, and the filmmaking process can be very personal. To keep up with the times, I've digitized Chins. It was originally published in hardcover/analog fifteen years ago, which is a vast amount of time in the evolution of books and technology, and it was time to get current. The advance of technology is great for a book like this, which is jammed full of pictures. When it came out originally, the photographs all had to be black and white and moderately sized on the page. Now, any photo that was originally taken in color can strut its stuff. Overall, the resolution of the images is off-the-charts better than the first go-around. This is one "sequel" that I'm happy to be a part of, since we could make so many technical improvements. The process was very similar to restoring an old movie. Since I knew that it was going to be reissued, I also had a look at the story being told and decided to condense, move, or clarify some chapters, all or in part. I also tried to add a hint of historical context, since it has been a decade and a half since Chins first came out. I hope you enjoy it. Regards, Bruce Campbell

If Chins Could Kill

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If Chins Could Kill by Bruce Campbell Summary

Chronicles the life of actor Bruce Campbell from his childhood in Detroit through his time spent making the film Evil Dead to his days in Hollywood.

If Chins Could Kill

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If Chins Could Kill by Bruce Campbell Summary

Chronicles the life of actor Bruce Campbell from his childhood in Detroit through his time spent making the film Evil Dead to his days in Hollywood.

Hail to the Chin

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Hail to the Chin by Bruce Campbell,Craig Sanborn Summary

It's been 15 years since his first memoir but Bruce is still living the dream as a "B" movie king in an "A" movie world. Bruce Campbell makes his triumphant return from where he left off in If Chins Could Kill with further hilarious, gut-wrenchingly honest confessions. Bruce brings us through his life in the decade since his first memoir and his roles as varied as they are numerous- from his roles in the Spider-man movies to his self-referential My Name is Bruce to his role on #1 show Burn Notice and his new STARZ hit series Ash vs Evil Dead. Over the last 15 years, Bruce has become a regular on the Wizard World convention circuit, has created his @GroovyBruce twitter account with over 400,000 followers and a Facebook page with almost 250,000 likes. His profile and reach is lightyears beyond where it was for Chins. Check him out at www.Bruce-Campbell.com. Hail to the Chin will be bursting with pictures and the signature humor that Bruce brought to If Chins Could Kill and will be devoured by his legions of fans across the country.

Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way

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Make Love the Bruce Campbell Way by Bruce Campbell Summary

What you're reading right now is known as the "cover copy," or “flap copy.” This is where the 84,951 words of my latest book are cooked down to 350 words or less to capture your imagination/download. I pondered how to do that. Should I cut to the chase and reveal pivotal plot points like the one at the end of the book where the little girl on crutches points an accusing finger and shouts, "the killer is Mr. Porter"? No. I have too much respect for you as an intelligent consumer to attempt such an obvious ruse. But let's not play games here. You clicked your way to this page, so you either: A. Know who I am. B. Like the cool smoking jacket I'm wearing on the cover. Or: C. Thought this was a secret link to Ashley Madison. Is it a sequel to my autobiography If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor? Sadly, no, which made it much harder to write. Is it an "autobiographical novel"? Yes. I am the lead character in the story (coincidentally an actor), and I am a real person, and everything in the book actually happened - except for the stuff that didn't. The action revolves around my preparations for a pivotal role in the A-list relationship film, Let's Make Love! My Homeric attempt to break through the glass ceiling of B-grade genre fair is hampered by a vengeful studio executive and a production that becomes infected by something called the "B-movie virus" - symptoms of which include excessive use of cheesy special effects, slapstick, and projectile vomiting. From a violent fistfight with a Buddhist to a life-altering stint in federal prison, this novel has it all. And if the 84,951 words are too time-consuming, there are lots and lots of cool graphics – all of which have been upgraded to vibrant color since the first publication. I hope you enjoy the book – and if you learn anything at all about making love, please share it with me! Regards, Bruce "Go Ahead and Call Me Ash" Campbell

The Evil Dead Companion

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The Evil Dead Companion by Bill Warren Summary

A noted film historian provides a close-up look at the making of Sam Raimi's cult-classic horror trilogy--The Evil Dead, Evil Dead II: Dead by Dawn, and Army of Darkness--offers interviews with its director, Sam Raimi, star, Bruce Campbell, and other members of the cast and crew, as well as storyboards, previously unpublished photographs, personal anecdotes, and more. Original. 15,000 first printing.

Fat People

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Fat People by Bill Schubart Summary

Schubart tackles the difficult subject of people and their relationship with food. The 14 stories he tells are by turns poignant and evocative, touching on all facets of obesity-addictive behavior, the pressure of prejudice, and the intimate psychological development of people for whom food becomes both companionship and family.

Hollywood Monster

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Hollywood Monster by Robert Englund,Alan Goldsher Summary

A Simon & Schuster eBook. Simon & Schuster has a great book for every reader.

Crimson Orgy

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Crimson Orgy by Austin Williams Summary

Grindhouse director Sheldon Meyer is cultivating an obsession. He has just one hellish week to shoot "Crimson Orgy," seventy-six minutes of mayhem destined to become the world's most notorious cult movie... and just maybe the first true "snuff film" ever made. Struggling to cope with a reluctant starlet, a booze-ravaged leading man, a backwoods cop bent on revenge, a mutinous crew, a devastating hurricane, and his own inner demons, Meyer relentlessly pursues a vision of unrivaled box office horror. He gets what he's after, but at a price no one could imagine!

Theaker's Quarterly Fiction #50

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Theaker's Quarterly Fiction #50 by Stephen Theaker,John Greenwood Summary

This issue features fiction from many previous contributors to the zine, who have returned to help celebrate fifty issues and ten years of Theaker's Quarterly Fiction: Antonella Coriander, David Tallerman, Douglas J. Ogurek, Howard Phillips, Howard Watts, John Greenwood, Matthew Amundsen, Michael Wyndham Thomas, Mitchell Edgeworth, Rafe McGregor and Walt Brunston. Plus reviews from Douglas J. Ogurek, Howard Watts, Jacob Edwards and Stephen Theaker. The TQF team answer questions from the public in Ask Theaker's! Cover artist Howard Watts takes readers through his process! And there's a round-up of everything Stephen Theaker read this year but didn't have time to review!

Dirty Jokes and Beer

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Dirty Jokes and Beer by Drew Carey Summary

.Drew Carey scripted and starred in his own cable special for years before hooking up with Bruce Helford and creating The Drew Carey Show. He is also the host of his own show Whos Line Is It Anyway? We all know Drew Carey from his award-winning stand-up career and his hit television show, but do we really know Drew Carey, the person Now, meet the true Drew, in his book, the bawdy, irreverent, and hilarious Dirty Jokes and Beer, and find out about all the many sides of the misunderstood Hollywood star.

I, Survivor

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I, Survivor by Andrew Yong Summary

On Mardi Gras weekend in February of 2007 over 40 people were butchered beyond recognition in a lonely Louisiana bayou. The horrific tragedy would go on to be known as The Honey Island Swamp Massacre. Paramedic ANDREW YONG was one of the first responders called to the scene over that fateful weekend and was mysteriously the only survivor of the mass killing spree that took place. Standing by his testimony that the murders were carried out by the ghost of local urban legend "Victor Crowley," Yong would immediately become the only suspect in what has since been called "the trial of this century." Though acquitted and exonerated across the board by a grand jury, Yong's story has only spawned more questions than answers and even a decade later the world still considers him to in fact be "the Bayou Butcher." Now, on the 10th anniversary of The Honey Island Swamp Massacre, Yong shares his horrifying account of what really happened that weekend in disturbingly graphic detail. From his upbringing as an outcast... to his tumultuous marriage and divorce from television personality Sabrina Caruthers... to the hell that his life has become in the aftermath of "Victor Crowley"... Yong opens up about living through what is still considered by many to be the most brutal unsolved mass murder of all time.

If Books Could Kill

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If Books Could Kill by Kate Carlisle Summary

On a trip to Scotland, bookbinder Brooklyn Wainwright gets caught up in case involving a forbidden masterpiece in the second novel in the New York Times bestselling Bibliophile Mystery series. Book restoration expert Brooklyn Wainwright is happy to be attending the world-renowned Edinburgh Book Fair. But then her ex, Kyle McVee, shows up with a bombshell. He has an original copy of a scandalous text that could change history—and humiliate the beloved British monarchy. Trying to get Kyle’s story out of her mind, Brooklyn takes a nighttime tour of the city. Unfortunately, the first landmark contains a real dead body—Kyle’s. The police are convinced Brooklyn’s the culprit, but with an entire convention of suspects, Brooklyn’s conducting her own investigation. Before she can crack the case, she’ll have to find out if the motive for murder was a 200-year-old secret—or something much more personal...

Thanks for the Money

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Thanks for the Money by Joel McHale Summary

From actor and comedian Joel McHale comes the most important celebrity-penned book of this, or any, generation. Part shocking tell-all memoir, part aspirational how-to guide, and mostly all book, this one-of-a-kind tome is required reading for anyone who enjoys Hollywood gossip, get-rich-gradually tips, and copious illustrations and charts. “…Thanks for the Money is a clever, much-needed antidote to the age of celebrity book deals. If the tide can’t be stopped, at least it can be mocked.”—EW.com Joel McHale pulls back the curtain on his personal journey to stardom! Here, for the first time, Joel reveals all that has molded him into the acclaimed comic actor he is today: a love of performance, a series of boyhood head injuries, and most importantly, a passion for financial compensation and free shoes. It’s all here: Joel’s career trials and tribulations, his criminal trials and tribulations, and an honest, unflinching list of all the people he’s been paid money to make out with, on camera. But the book does not stop there! Because if you want wealth, fame, and cost-free footwear, Joel will share every vital tip he has learned: an insanely low-carb diet plan, how to escape from a certain pseudo-religious celebrity cult, and more! How can you unlock the power of the Joel McHale who lurks inside? What happened when Joel fought his Community co-star Chevy Chase? And hey, while we’re at it, what’s up with Joel’s hair—really? All will be revealed, within the pages of Thanks for the Money. Buy now, and receive—as a special bonus—an email receipt that details your purchase! From the Hardcover edition.

Evil Dead 2

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Evil Dead 2 by Rebecca Martz-Burley Summary

The officially licensed Evil Dead 2 cross-stitch craft book from renowned horror stitcher Rebecca Martz-Burley! Featuring over 20 patterns to create Evil Dead 2 artwork or adorn and customize items in your home!

Straight Outta Crawley

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Straight Outta Crawley by Romesh Ranganathan Summary

**THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR ANY COMEDY FAN** Straight Outta Crawley is the hilarious and irreverent autobiography from comedian Romesh Ranganathan. At the age of 9, Romesh Ranganathan delivered his first ever stand-up set at a Pontin's holiday camp talent competition, smashing the other competitor, a young girl playing the kazoo. The gig went so well that Romesh retired his comic genius for twenty-two years, hiding behind the guise of a maths teacher, before finally revealing himself again (no, not like that) at the tender age of 31. In 2010, Ranganathan staged his epic comeback gig to an almost silent room, and has since gone on to earn his place as the most in-demand overweight vegan Sri Lankan comedian in Britain. Now, for the first time, he tells the full story of how he got here. From the delights of Sri Lankan hospitality to his struggles as a child, teacher and now parent, to his adolescent flirtation with a rap career and his attempts to make it in comedy, Straight Outta Crawley is Ranganathan's hilarious and irreverent autobiography.

A Life in Parts

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A Life in Parts by Bryan Cranston Summary

A memoir and meditation on creativity by the star of "Breaking Bad" chronicles his theatrical childhood and recommitment to acting in the aftermath of his father's disappearance, describing his early acting jobs and the performances that earned him Tony and Emmy Awards.

Chain Saw Confidential

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Chain Saw Confidential by Gunnar Hansen Summary

When The Texas Chain Saw Massacre first hit movie screens in 1974 it was both reviled and championed. To critics, it was either "a degrading, senseless misuse of film and time" or "an intelligent, absorbing and deeply disturbing horror film." However it was an immediate hit with audiences. Banned and celebrated, showcased at the Cannes film festival and included in the New York MoMA's collection, it has now come to be recognized widely as one of the greatest horror movies of all time. A six-foot-four poet fresh out of grad school with limited acting experience, Gunnar Hansen played the masked, chain-saw-wielding Leatherface. His terrifying portrayal and the inventive work of the cast and crew would give the film the authentic power of nightmare, even while the gritty, grueling, and often dangerous independent production would test everyone involved, and lay the foundations for myths surrounding the film that endure even today. Critically-acclaimed author Hansen here tells the real story of the making of the film, its release, and reception, offering unknown behind-the-scenes details, a harrowingly entertaining account of the adventures of low-budget filmmaking, illuminating insights on the film's enduring and influential place in the horror genre and our culture, and a thoughtful meditation on why we love to be scared in the first place.

Hatchet Job

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Hatchet Job by Mark Kermode Summary

The finest film critic in Britain at the absolute top of his form' Stephen Fry'Entertainingly incendiary stuff' EmpireA hatchet job isn't just a bad review, it's a total trashing. Mark Kermode is famous for them - Pirates of the Caribbean, Sex and the City 2, the complete works of Michael Bay. Beginning with his favourite hatchet job ever, Mark tells us about the best bad reviews in history, why you have to be willing to tell a director face-to-face their movie sucks, and about the time he apologized to Steven Spielberg for badmouthing his work.But why do we love really bad reviews? Is it so much harder to be positive? And is the Internet ruining how we talk about cinema? The UK's most trusted film critic answers all these questions and more in this hilarious, fascinating and argumentative new book. 'A wry, robust and developed defence of accountable critical voices' Total Film'Very accessible, entertaining and relevant . . . warmly recommended' Den of Geek